Icing tubs and up high things

I was going to blog yesterday. But I didn’t. I was SAD. Sad because my husband left for Germany yesterday for a month. I asked him not to leave. The conversation went something like this:

ME: Don’t leave.

HIM: But I gotta.

ME: What’s in Germany anyways? Germans? And pristine autobahns? Politeness? Who wants to leave dirty Italy for that? Italy has CHARM and it has me and your house and please don’t leave I’ll love you forever pretty please with sugar on top. *insert Puss in Boots level sad puppy dog eyes here*

HIM: And they have schnitzel!

So.

The thing is, I used to be fine with him leaving. I know that sounds mean and wicked but it was true. He would leave every other month for six months and then left for 15 months and I was good. I got to watch whatever I wanted on TV uninterrupted. I got to have everything in the fridge the way I wanted it. All of the juice labels were facing outwards. It was nice to have everything just so.

But he’s been home now for quite a few months. I’ve gotten used to finding boxers on the floor next to the hamper instead of in it. I’ve gotten used to hearing him sing while he’s shaving and I’m in the bedroom at night. And things on high shelves were ATTAINABLE with him around.

I’m not fine with him leaving any more. I NEED those things in those high places. We’ve been married three years and the first two were pretty much spent apart. Him coming home from Afghanistan this last time was really like our honeymoon period. And I discovered something. I LIKE my husband. I mean, really LIKE him. He’s funny and has a cute butt and is a reacher of high things and he drives slow when I’m in the car because he wants to keep me safe and he LOVES me even on my craziest day. Really, really loves me. Anybody want that to go to Germany? Me neither.

Yesterday I didn’t post because I was sad. And I was busy eating a tub of frosting and a roll of crescent rolls and feeling sorry for myself. Obviously much more important and productive things than blogging. (Small digression: If you eat a whole tub of icing and then watch True Blood for the first time late at night right before bed expect to have scary vampire dreams where it feels like you really have to poop in the dream the whole time. Just a kindly warning.)

MOVING ONWARD: I’m going to a writer’s workshop tonight with Daniel Wallace. He’s the guy that wrote BIG FISH. It was turned into a movie. I forgot my camera, which I’m still kicking myself for but I bought new pens. So I’ll give you a play by play tomorrow.